Honesty Time: The In Between

I miss my girl. My last partner in crime. My errand buddy. My girl-time, play-date, right hand man.

I feel in between.

And a little lost if I'm being honest--and I'm trying to be honest.

This is a strange stage of life for me. My kids go off to school, all of them, and then I'm home... and I don't speak to another human being for a long time--except in class.

I'm in school--and that helps. I at least see other humans... occasionally. And I really am loving the learning.

By the way, since I'm being honest I really hate it when people say: Oh, you went back to school, I guess you had to find something to do since your kids are all gone...
I cannot tell you how many times I've heard that. And I want to say- Listen, Dude, I have PLENTY of things to do. That is not my problem, boredom is not the reason I'm doing this.

I'm not bored.
I'm a little lonely, sometimes, not always.
All of the things that I do, I now do without my little helpers.
Also, it's strange, because when Little Miss would go to preschool, I would write like crazy... well, now I have all day and I don't get any more writing done than when she was home. And the reasons I'm not getting it done aren't nearly as precious and important as they were last year when she was home, when she was the reason.

I just feel in between. In between what... I don't know. Stages of life... Really, I'm just onto a new one. I just haven't figured out how to do it yet.

And I'm not uphappy--honesty here. I'm really not.
I just feel like I'm figuring out how to be me in this stage of life.

I think everyone has to figure it out--don't they? I think we all do... which means we aren't alone.

I don't know how much it helps, but we aren't alone!
You aren't alone new mom, whose baby won't sleep!
You aren't alone single momma, who's working her tail off trying to do it all.
You aren't alone stay-at-home mom, with no more kids to stay home with! (I'm right there with ya).
You aren't alone momma of the teens who you pray are listening to the lessons you've been teaching the last whatever-teen years!
You aren't alone empty nester, whose children are grown and have left strange kind of loneliness in your home... or maybe you're calling it peace. ;) --no judgments, we're all different and yet so many of us are right there together, same boat, not alone.