Rejection and I are like good friends who've hung out on several occasions.
There are so many benefits to rejection. I know it. I've experienced it. I've benefited from it.
But right now, I really want to tell rejection to suck it and hands off my kid.
My L. He loves sports. Football, soccer and very much so basketball. He was so excited to try out for the junior high basketball team. The first time he actually had to "try out" for anything! He would come straight home from school, get ready, talk my ear off about the orange ball and then an HOUR and TEN minutes later we'd head to try outs. He'd come home red in the face, sweaty, legs killing and smiling. It was a good pain. It was a good sweat.
And then... (I'm guessing you've all guessed) yesterday he was cut.
Cut.
Cutting causes bleeding and pain and tears... can't they call it--> Maybe Next Time?
Yeah... cut makes a lot more sense.
We sat in the middle of the road, my car crooked in a bad u-turn and just hugged. Driving home I tried to say all the right things-- "I'm so proud of you!", "You did so great!", "There's always next year.", "I'm sorry.".
And my boy. He was visibly very sad, but all he said was, "I'm so happy for "T, J, B..." Yeah, all his friends made it.
And I wanted to turn around and curse that school-- "Don't you realize you've cut the nicest kid on the planet??" I'm guessing they don't care about or evaluate "nice" though.
I wanted to curse the fact that I had zero athletic skills to pass onto him.
I kind of wanted to curse team sports all together--which isn't a great plan, since it's a team sport that pays my college coach husband and my house-bill.
Ugh.
We got home and while his brothers offered him condolences, I locked myself in my room and cried, cried like a baby.
Crud. This was so much harder than if they'd just cut me.
I have suffered multiple rejections--they did not feel like this.
Rejection has it's blessings, it really does bring benefits. I know that! It's apart of life--everyone's life! I know that too. So... I'm trying to see those for L. Man, it's hard to see when it's your baby.
But I'm trying to see the good. He's doing a much better job at it than I am.
The Blessings of Rejection
(to name a few...)
1. It's a chance to grow. Constant approval does not stretch us, teach, help us.
2. It's an opportunity to explore new things. We aren't all good at the same things. Thank goodness!! Rejections helps us to discover and try something new.
3. Patience. Yes. It gives us more of that.
4. It can motivate us to work harder, try again, do better.
and
5. It makes us stronger. A person who is handed everything they want is a weak person.
I believe all these things. I do. Rejection brings all kinds of blessings. I do want all of these blessings for my kids. Still, if I'm honest--I don't want them all the time. Success is nice too.
In the mean time, we're going to be patient and exploring and hopefully becoming better people.
